Saturday, October 07, 2006

Things I Learned This Week: 10/7/06

Last week I decided to begin a new feature on Saturdays. Because I want to spare you from experiencing some of the things I endured over the last few days, I started something called “Things I Learned This Week.” It’s educational, sometimes insightful and always pathetic. I hope after sharing this list that at least one item will make your upcoming week much easier. So here is the second installment of “Things I Learned This Week” for the week of 10/1/06-10/7/06.

! I learned that when you are with a female co-worker and another female in your vicinity bends over and inadvertently exposes her thong, it’s no use pretending you don’t see it because you are with another female and you want to be a gentleman. Especially since your female co-worker is going to make a big deal out of it and point out the exposed thong to you anyway.

! I learned that when the nurse giving you your flu shot is named Mercy, you can’t take for granted that it still won’t hurt. A lot.

! I learned that when you are working late and singing “You’re Cheatin’ Heart” by Hank Williams Sr. as loud as you can, don’t always assume there is no one else in the building just because you don’t see anyone. This one was embarrassing to learn.

! I learned that no matter how exciting it is for me to go through the Halloween aisle at Target, my four year olds may not think that fake severed heads, hands, skeletons and Draculas are all that exciting.

! I learned that getting into work late because I stopped to buy the new George Strait album on the way in isn’t as valid an excuse to others as it is to me.

! I learned that even though the charcoal has ashed over and appears a cool gray, it’s still not a good idea to flick it with your fingers when you need to move it during cooking.


And lastly…


! I learned that when "Mommy" is out of town and you want to spoil Daddy's little girls, don’t let them eat Oreo cookies on your bed…on brand new sheets.

13 comments:

Ra Ra said...

I've already learned the ones about the charcoal and the thong through my own mistakes. The rest of them are valuable life lessons to learn. Thanks for pioneering for the rest of us.

Empress Bee (of the high sea) said...

priceless lessons for anyone! see you tonight at the ba meeting! bee

Irene said...

Uh-oh! I can only imagine the scenario when Mommy returned to see the sheets peppered with Oreo crumbs. HAHAHA! c",)

Ian said...

In my house, it tends to be Cheez-it crumbs, which are just as bad but make your bed orange instead of black and make it smell like cheese instead of cookies. ;)

Ian

Cathy said...

I really like this idea...We all learn lessons everyday...Great post..

Lee said...

oooohhh...you're in TRouble. ;)

who wouda thunk it?? said...

MMM, I think I should jot a few of these down, I like Hank

Odat said...

Hey, you can't wear jeans at your job, but thongs you can see when bending over are ok???? hmmmmmm ...
Crumbs on bedsheets are always a no no!!!
I would have thought that stopping to buy a new "album" would be a good excuse.
I'm all for singing your heart out and who cares if anyone hears it.
;-)
Peace

Pickled Olives said...

LOL a nurse named Mercy who sucks at flu shots. Ouch.

Oreo's on the new sheets??? Uh-oh.
Thanks for the tips!

Smalltown RN said...

Very good points......you made me smile the whole way through your post....still smiling....

have a grand weekend....

see you at the meeting.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Another great Michael post!

What's in a name, you ask. Not that much, as it turns out. One of my worst hair experiences was perpetrated by a hairdresser name Botticelli.

Oh, by the way, you've been tagged! See me in my office.

thethinker said...

The singing situation is exactly the reason I restrict my karoake sessions to the shower.

Michael C said...

Thank you all for your comments. I am glad that I was able to help.

P.S. The Oreos don't come out very easily ;-)