Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Maybe They Should Just Name It ‘Find Me Elmo’

The official Christmas shopping season is not even upon us yet and there is already mounting concern (ok, it may not be mounting yet, but it sounds more dramatic that way) about the availability of the new Elmo TMX (Tickle Me Extreme). Not only does Elmo still laugh when tickled, he now rolls on the floor laughing and is much more animated in his reactions. In short, it sounds like Elmo comes awfully close to a seizure when tickled. I hope it comes with a warning to move all furniture away from Elmo before your turn him on!

Officially, TMX stands for Tickle Me Extreme, but I think the X means something different to the folks at Fisher-Price who make Elmo TMX. They can’t be found anywhere on store shelves and they have already been tabbed as the one toy every kid will want this Christmas. Well not every kid, I can’t imagine Elmo being too popular with the 8 and over crowd. My guess is that the X stands for 10, as in there were only 10 of these dolls made. That explains why we can’t find them anywhere. Who thought that finding a new Elmo doll would rival finding cheap gas this past summer? I’m guessing 7 of the 10 will end up on E-Bay, too.

As a preemptive measure, my wife and I are only allowing our twins (code named Lucy and Ethel) to watch DVD’s until Christmas has passed. That will allow us to shelter them from any Elmo commercials that may appear. I even floated the idea of keeping them out of preschool until after Christmas to avoid peer pressure, but the idea wasn’t too popular (with both my family and the girls’ school for some reason). The last thing I want is to be running around in a panic late on Christmas Eve with 300 bucks and a ’68 VW Bug that I’m willing to trade for an Elmo TMX doll. Especially since they’ll grow tired of it by the time the Christmas Turkey (or lobster, hamburgers or chicken fried steak) is served anyway.

I wouldn’t run out and sacrifice your life to find one though, because I hear there are a few more Elmos in the development pipeline. If all goes well, next summer should see the arrival of ‘Toot Toot Elmo,’ who comes equipped with a whoopee cushion on his underside. The kiddies will have a field day with that one, actually so will most adult males now that I think about it. Later next year will also bring us ‘Two Packs A Day Elmo’ that will lift a cigarette to its mouth and actually puff. Don’t worry; it will be the Clinton-ized version that does not inhale. There are rumors of ‘American Idol Elmo,’ which will sing the same sugar sweet song until its batteries run out or you’ve thrown it against the wall too many times. Lastly, by next Christmas there should be ‘Older Sibling Elmo’ who responds to every command by saying “I told you so!”

The Elmo that didn’t make it beyond the idea board was the one that may have been the most fun. Its name was “Fussy Cussy Elmo.” I’ll let you assume what he says and does when touched. Hint: it contains a few choice expletives.

17 comments:

Odat said...

Ohh I hate when this happens every year!!!! I'm glad those days are over for me..however, I would really love a TMX...I laugh everytime i hear Elmo laughing...!!
Poor Lucy and Ethel tho...keeping them so sheltered like that..not a good idea...I hope your find one, or do you have to get two?????
Good luck with that!
(I can think of one more "Elmo", err for the adult crowd, but I won't say nuttin here, he he)...
Peace!

Dr. A said...

Found this amusing posting on eBay!

Empress Bee said...

where do you have to touch fussy cussy elmo? oooh i'm creeping myself our michael. do you think tmx is like pms? seems like everyone has that today. bee

mist1 said...

I have a Jiggle Me Elmo.

It's lots of fun. Like J-ello.

C said...

My kid would freak. He does not like anything that talks or moves when it is not supposed to especially if it has fake eyes.

Josie said...

You know, I hate to say it, but Tickle Me Extreme TMX sounds almost too kinky for a kid's toy. Or is it just me...?

Cheers,
Josie

Lizza said...

You brave the Christmas rush and go through all sorts of hassle just to find this kind of toy and buy them for the kids, and within a couple of hours after opening it and playing with it they find that the box that another toy came in is more fun. :-) There should be a Morphing Elmo, so that kids won't get bored with it too easily.

Michael C said...

Odat: We'd try to get away with two, but I'm sure it wouldn't last for long!

Dr. A: Wow, I guess anyone can try and make an easy buck these days!

Empress Bee: Chances are you just have to look at Fussy Cussy Elmo the wrong way to set him off ;-)

Mist1: I don't know whether to believe you or not sometimes ;-)

C: Sadly, the twins would probably freak about it just as easily.

Josie: I fear you may be right!

Lizza: Even I would buy and be fascinated with Morphing Elmo.

Suspect said...

Clinton + Elmo

Hmm...

...that gives me some ideas :)

ShadowFalcon said...

Elmo is sooooooo cute but I still prefer Oscar the Gruch.

How can people already be shopping for x-mas I don't even have a halloween outfit yet!

Sean Carter said...

great blog and an interesting review on elmo as well. actually u r right,these toy companies are going a bit off the hook. i mean these dolls hardly click for long. check out this Christmas Blog for some really cool gift ideas.

Alex said...

ITs all made up. They leak a fake story about the shortage, so nucklehead americans go out and buy. Like cattle drawn into the meat processing plant. Pathetic.

SGT DUB said...

I feel the best idea for a toy like this is to wait until it's not a big thing and then buy it for all the kids of parents you want to annoy. Nothing like sitting peacefully in your living room and then hearing that thing go off forever with nobody around it.

slaghammer said...

How about Valium Dispenser Elmo? It’s just about time for my holiday sedation. I should wake up sometime around January 2nd.

NATALIE said...

ok I saw video of this doll laughing and slapping his...shall we say knee? It was the funniest thing I have ever seen. I kind of wanted one. Not that I would ever brave that storm but it was really funny. Not to mention it looked (and sounded) somewhat perverse. Does anyone else know that Elmo is a tall black man?

Irene said...

I react the same way when tickled. Hmmmm. Maybe they should come up with a Tickle Me Loony Irene Extreme Doll? :p

Sigh. My son would love, love, love this toy! I meant the Elmo, not the Loony Mommy! :p

PARLANCHEQ said...

Not sure why fussy cussy Elmo didn't make the cut. I think it would help extend the age range of Elmo's appeal into the pre-teen years. ;)