Because I want to spare you from experiencing some of the things I endured over the last few days, I post “Things I Learned This Week” each Saturday. It’s educational, sometimes insightful and for some reason it never makes me look good. I hope that knowing about at least one item on this list will make your upcoming week much easier. So here are the “Things I Learned This Week” for the week of 5/27/07-6/2/07.
! I learned that Lucy and Ethel enjoy making ice cream more than they enjoy eating it. I also learned that 2 quarts of uneaten half frozen ice cream takes up an awful lot of room in the freezer.
! I learned that having access to my office’s software programs, applications and networks from home means that I still am actually expected to be in the office every day. Who knew?
! I learned that a staff meeting setting isn’t exactly the best place to discuss the basketball game from the night before with a coworker, especially when the boss is still talking and is trying to ask you a question.
! I learned that I should not have taught Lucy and Ethel how to say ‘oh snap.’ While it may have been cute a year and a half ago, they now use it in almost every sentence.
! I learned that telling a nurse ‘it’s the most mild case I’ve ever had of this’ isn’t exactly the best thing to say to get you seen quickly in the emergency room. I also learned that when a nurse has to position the needle in your arm three different times without striking the vein, I should just be prepared to hear ‘sorry, I’m going to have to pull this one out and try someplace else.’
! I learned that $50 can go a long way towards an enjoyable evening. In my case, $50 was worth eight hours in my own little room, sedation, an IV, several attempts at drawing blood and the entertainment of listening to everyone else’s medical problems. Really, who needs TV when you can just watch the real thing? How much is getting to come home without having fixed what I had to go in for in the first place? You guessed it…priceless.