Monday, Monday? How About Funday, Funday!

Although it’ll almost be over by the time you read this post, I have to say how much I hate Mondays. I know that I am not alone and it’s certainly not a new sentiment among the blogging community. You can see the disdain for Mondays on the faces of coworkers, other commuters and just about everyone you interact with on this solemn day.

It’s time to address the issue head on. Monday should be removed from our calendar. I propose that we make Tuesday the new Monday. Of course, Tuesday has done nothing to deserve the wrath that becoming the new Monday will bring. Therefore, I also propose that Tuesdays become a universal casual dress day at work (by casual I mean shorts and sandals, not bow ties and suspenders). That and the fact that it’s one day closer to the weekend should help Tuesday remain the somewhat innocuous day it already is.

I don’t expect much flak about the abandonment of Mondays except from the folks getting royalties on music about Mondays. I’m speaking of tunes like “Manic Monday,” “Come Monday,” “Monday, Monday” and my favorite “Rainy Days and Mondays.” Those songs would become outdated over night. Would it affect “Ruby Tuesday?” I don’t know, although the Stones are doing pretty well financially so I’m not too concerned.

When we remove Monday from the calendar it will set in motion a horrible period of chaos and confusion as was expected to occur during the dawn of Y2K (remember buying up canned goods and erecting a Y2K bunker? No, well then never mind, you daredevil). To avoid the problems that converting to a 6 day week would cause, I’ve come up with a solution I hope will be a popular one. We will name the new day Funday and it will become essentially the new Sunday. This will create the 3-day weekend, every weekend.

So there you have it, a well thought out fair and balanced solution to Mondays. Now if I can just find some crackpot candidate belonging to some obscure political party, we’ll be good to go. We’ll call the new party the Calendarians. Imagine how well a candidate campaigning on the Calendarians’ “Create Funday” ticket would be. How in the world can you run a smear campaign against that? Even if the party loses, man the nominating convention will be a blast!