Surely I Must Be Dreaming

Not only was that James Bond’s reaction to hearing Honor Blackman say that her name is Pussy Galore in ‘Goldfinger,’ but it was also my reaction to reading that there will be a new Knight Rider TV movie…and that The Hoff will be in it! Granted he’ll be playing Michael Knight as the father of the new Knight kid driving the new Kitt (or something like that). The new KITT hasn’t been selected yet. As a kid of the ‘80s, I guess it was my responsibility to like Knight Rider, just like it was my responsibility to like The A-Team, The Fall guy, Airwolf, The Dukes of Hazzard, Different Strokes and Silver Spoons.

You probably know what’s coming next, don’t you. Yep, I’m wondering how all those other favorite ‘80s shows could be given a 2008 TV movie treatment. Take the A-Team for instance. Yes, Hannibal has passed on, but we could use that as the plot point. The rest of the Team comes out of hiding to reunite for his funeral and is approached by someone who needs their help and thought they might show up at the funeral. Of course Admiral Decker assumed this too, even though he is retired, so the A-Team arrives in disguises. Face’s Corvette has been replaced by a new European sports car and the famous black van is now a Dodge Caravan mini-van, with in-seat DVD screens. Also, Murdoch is now a psychiatrist, specializing in multi-personality disorders. BA owns a jewelry pawnshop and Face is a soap opera actor. Yeah, I’d watch at least the first 15 minutes of it.

I would like to see a Fall Guy reunion too. The theme song for that show was great. It was also sung by Lee Majors. Sadly, I don’t remember it well enough though (other than the blonde and the cool brown Chevy truck) to mock it. But I DO remember Silver Spoons. Ok, I remember Erin Grey who was on Silver Spoons. I think it also had some blonde haired kid in it like that dude Zach from Saved By The Bell or maybe it was the kid from NYPD Blue. It’s really hard to remember now, I mean with the Erin Grey memories flooding back and all. And that makes me think of Buck Rogers because she was in that too. I mean she’s no Tina Fey, but definitely deserves special mention.

A Different Strokes reunion would be nice. Maybe the girl that subbed for Jan (or maybe it was Marcia) in one of the Brady Bunch reunions could play Kimberly Drummond. It could be called Whatcha You Talkin’ Bout: The Different Strokes Reunion. I wonder ff both of the Drummond’s housekeepers are still around? If Mrs. Garrett is still kicking, the reunion could air the same night as the Facts of Life Reunion. Ahh, if but to see Tootie, Blair, Molly and Jo again. Yeah, I just wrote ‘if but to see.’ I thought it evoked whimsy and longing. Whatever. And no, I have not forgotten that George Clooney was once a cast member of that fine program. I just can’t see him reprising his role though. Maybe Ricky Schroeder can reprise it for him. Ricky Schroeder, now where have I heard that name before?

A Cagney and Lacey reunion might be good. They could both be retired and substitute teaching in Miami. Each week they would kick some smart wise-cracking kid’s butt and teach said kid the value of a life well lived. I’d also like to see how the kids from Mr. Belvedere and Head of the Class turned out. Wow, I watched too much TV as a kid. I’m actually starting to wonder worry if any of my childhood memories were real or something that I watched on TV. Although I’m pretty sure I remember my Uncle jumping that shark during our beachside family reunion that one summer. He always used to wear that worn out black leather jacket. Boy was he a character.

I mentioned before I tripped the rerun fantastic that no new car had been picked to serve as KITT yet. How about a convertible PT Cruiser? Or some lowered Honda with a tale pipe thicker than the mid-section of a pig before slaughter? I guess it really doesn’t matter what they pick as long as it has that ‘woo-woo’ Cylon moving red light on the hood. The new KITT could be voiced by Steve Carell, or to really get with the times, a woman. How about Tina Fey? Actually, Barbara Bush might be ideal for conveying a stern yet caring vehicle. Or Fred Willard. Or Bob Newhart. Everything they touch is golden. I’d certainly listen to them. Although if either one of them were ever speaking to me I’d probably pass out. No, I’d soil myself then pass out. What if the new KITT was a truck and was voiced by Dolly Parton? Yeah, that would be nice. Man oh man am I fighting back the urge to make a crack about KITT having ‘airbags’ right now. Sorry, the doctors tell me I’ll grow up some day…