Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Q&A Tuesday -- #4

Wow, I made it to the 4th edition of Q & A Tuesday. And yet surprisingly, the questions just keep coming. There is another great batch this week. It almost makes me feel bad for you that I am the one answering these. Once again, we need to review the rules: I don’t spell check my answers, no taking notes, no quoting me, no actual application of my answers is permitted, I am not licensed to give out help of any kind and finally, as you read my answers, please remember that I was deprived of some oxygen as a baby. Oh yeah, I also spent last night watching ‘Fletch,’ ‘Fletch Lives’ and ‘The Three Amigos,’ so my sense of reality and good judgment is a little out of whack. OK folks, with that outta the way, let us begin…

Pawlie, my SF Giants loving friend (um, we’ll talk more about that later) joined us this week to ask ‘Does your title banner mean you are a basket case? And what IS a basket case anyway?’
My blog banner photo was carefully selected by my surrogate East Coast sister, AndreaAnna (or AA). I should defer to her for the answer, but I’ll go ahead. Hold on, I need to read your question again, I forgot it (seriously, I’m not making that up)….ok, yes basket case…My blog banner depicts a handsome, smart, intelligent and creative young man (just trust me) under a trash basket. If I could get away with that at work, I would. I think it symbolizes the manner in which I go through my work day. There’s a lot of trash constantly around me, but by putting the trash basket over my head, I am actually deflecting the said trash away from me. I think a basket case is what baskets are shipped to places like Target and Cost Plus in, although I have no real proof of this.

Pawlie also asked: ‘which is your favorite mark of punctuation? And which is your least favorite punctuation mark?!;:',....;’
My favorite would be the comma, because, I, like, using, effective, pauses, to, underscore, certain, ideas, when, I, write. My least favorite is this one: ‘;’ Why? It still trips me up a lot and tries to muscle in on the comma’s game!

Ian’s question made me hungry, but that’s ok, I can handle it. He asked: ‘What three foods will you eat until you're full up to the esophagus regardless of doctor's orders?’
Well, it would have to be lobster rolls, cheese and cheeseburgers. Although I have to caution you, after watching this year’s 4th of July hot dog eating contest, I have seen what it looks like when someone is full up to their esophagus and its aftermath. It isn’t pretty, so I’ll stop at the collar bone, just to be on the safe side.

This brings us to Brandy’s weekly 5 five. Man, can this girl ask questions! I know it’s payback for some questions I asked her, but I can take it as well as dish it out (that’s what she said, Bran!). Here we go…
1. What Disney character do you most relate to?
I would love to say someone cool like Donald, his nephews, Aladdin, Lightning McQueen or any of the side characters portrayed by Cliff Claven, but let’s be honest here. You have all read my blog….the answer is Goofy (sigh) and will always be Goofy.

2. If you could outlaw one person and force them to live the rest of their days in a cave, hidden deep in the desert, who would it be and why?
Easy – Jeff Freakin’ Gordon. If you aren’t familiar with NASCAR, let me just explain it this way…the dude is my personal Devil! He’s my mortal enemy. Does he know this? Well, I think he has heard me yelling at him from the stands of the California Speedway and Las Vegas Motor Speedway a few times. Yeah, I think he knows he’s on my cave banishment list!

3. What's love got to do with it?
Interesting question Tina Bran. The degree of love’s applicability is solely commensurate to where it is asking to be used. For example: Quantum Physics – love does NOT have to do with it. Conversely, there is makin’ babies – love DOES have to do with it. Brick laying – no love. Taking care of a baby at 4AM – forced love. As a wise man once said, there is ‘love or something like it…’

4. Would you rather fight a really angry Kenny Rogers or a bobcat?
Oooh, this is a good one! I would have to say the bobcat. I know this will come as a surprise to many of you because you view Kenny as more of a lover (or yes, a gambler), but I want to refer you to another Kenny, the angry, ‘gotta prove I’m not a coward’ Kenny. If you recall the Kenny that sang ‘Coward of the County,’ he took on the three Gatlin boys BY HIMSELF. I mean you could’ve heard a pin drop when he stopped and locked the door…That’s some serious anger. Bring on the bobcat, man!!!

5. If the presidential election was today, who would you vote for- and why?
Is Harry S. Truman still running? I’m finishing up a book about him and that was one good president! He ended WWII, saw us through FDR’s death and wore a cool hat and bow tie. Yes, if he’s still running, I say vote for Give ‘Em Hell Harry!!

Erica AP asked ‘Where in New England do you want to retire to?’
I’ve never thought that far ahead, really. Probably somewhere in Maine where my mom’s family is from. As long as it’s near a lobster shack and it can get satellite TV, I’m pretty ok with it. It would be nice it was coastally located. Perhaps near a Target. And a BBQ supply store. And a Chili’s. But those are my only requirements. Ok, a fondue place close by would be good to. It has to be off the main road. But that’s all, I swear. A Dairy Queen would be nice though…

Airam, who may just be becoming Corona’s biggest fan, wanted to know ‘if there's one thing about your past that you could change, would you? Why or why not?
Well, I know that when I was younger while my grandmother was swinging me from her arms into my bed, she accidentally slammed me into the wall. This, combined with my temporary lack of baby oxygen, has undoubtedly left some gaping holes in my intelligence. I don’t think you can tell though…..
I would take those episodes back. Then maybe I would pursue more noteworthy accomplishments than seeing just how close I can thread the needle between melted and burnt cheese.

I pondered including this next question for quite some time. As part of a much larger and legitimate comment, Heart of Darkness began the comment by writing ‘Haha, aren't you cute????’ Although it was asked in a sarcastic way, it nonetheless ended in a question mark and according to the rules set forth in Q&A Tuesday #1, I am therefore required to answer it, because it was posed in the form of a question. Will this get me into trouble? Most likely yes…
My answer. I’d certainly LIKE to think I am. Now if you asked the ladies eating across from us at the burger joint during lunch today, the answer would be a resounding NO!

The Exception is a new visitor who jumped right in to ask some hard hitting questions. She asked: ‘if you could have any job in the world, money is not an issue, what would that job be?’
I’m cheating as I can only narrow it down to 3. If I could have any job, I would want to be either a writer for SNL, David Letterman’s replacement or Mike Rowe’s replacement on ‘Dirty Jobs.’ I thought about saying US President, but it involves way too many hours!

The Exception then pulled out all the stops and asked ‘Secondly, my 7 year old recently asked "What is sex?" My question, how will you answer "What is sex?" when posed by one or both of your daughters?
Yikes! I will look at them seriously, point out the window and yell ‘look what the dog has in her mouth!’ Then I will run the type of run that Forrest Gump ran just because he felt like running…

Scottsdale Girl asked an inappropriate question. Ok, well not really, but kinda. I mean it did involve the word inappropriate. She asked ‘How do you feel about the inappropriate use of You're, your and yer also Their There and They're?’
Simply put, it annoys me when people use there grammar incorrectly. Your really not surprised by that though, right? I mean yer supposed to learn these things in school. Sorry, I had to. Or is it, too?

Frigga’s question just might explode my head. She wanted to know ‘If you have train A leaving Corona, Ca at 4:20pm and train B leaving Weed, Ca at 3:41pm, train A is going 97 mph & train B is going 73 mph and there's a bee. The bee can fly 159 mph, what time will the bee be crushed?
Whew! Uh, hmmmm. Well, let me see…oh my God! Look what the dog has in her mouth!!!

I love Patti’s questions (I mean she is a reporter and all) and this week was no different. Patti wondered ‘When you are saying things out loud, in the real world, do you say BBQ or the word "barbecue"?’
I actually say the word. I fear that if I just say the letters, people will think I’m trying to be cool, like when I used the work ‘mack’ as in ‘you should really go ‘mack’ on her. What, that’s not cool anymore? Oh man……


My bestest blogging buddy Odat asked 'Is it too late to ask a question?'
In the philosophical sense, it is never too late to ask questions. That is how we continue learning. In the Q&A Tuesday sense, it really isn't too late either. I hope that helps!!

And with that, I close this week's Q&A Tuesday! Thanks for all of the great questions, I hope I've been able to help at least a few of you and mark your calendars for next week!!

32 comments:

Heart Of Darkness said...

That was actually a very serious and deep question I threw at you back there... and, since you didn't honor the underwear-on-blog double dare (*grrrr*), I'm surprised you even picked the Q up! :D

But okay, cute most often, but not while eating... got that right, did I? ;)

Michael C said...

Heart: Yes, very right! I take eating very, very seriously!!!!! ;-)

Heart Of Darkness said...

IKF!!!!


...almost never... ;)

Michael C said...

Heart: Now that's a well played IKF!!!

Airam said...

Is it wrong that I laughed at the thought of you as an infant being slammed into a wall?

I'm going to be a horrible mother.

Michael C said...

Airam: Don't worry. I laugh about it all the time, but then I'm the one whose head crashed into a wall... ;-)
It's this sweet thing my grandmother and I share.

brandy said...

Oh MC, you teach me so much. While I did one Q & A and then backed off because of all the freaking work it takes to cut and paste and then THINK of answers, you continue on, and they get better each week. Poor Jeff Gordon. I don't think he has any idea.

Odat said...

Phew, I can get through my day now that I know it's never too late...
you're a real pal!!! hehe.
Peace

Bobby Griffin said...

The results are in!! Check em out and see where your blog ranks!

Michael C said...

Bran: Well, I did steal the idea from you! Oh Jeff Gordon knows, trust me...

Odat: There's always time for you!!

Bobby: 5th place, really? Thanks!!!

The Laughorist said...

You are far more clever than I am by half, or at least 0.4955437768931908. Great answers.

Patti said...

I must already be a horrible mother because I laughed out loud at the scene of you and grandma and the wall.
:-)

I'm with Pawlie, Michael. Great answers. I have a question already for next week. I thought I had asked it already, but guess not...
Thanks for the laughs.

Patti said...

P.S. I'll make sure Ralph gets back into the fun next week. He must have a question for ya.

The Exception said...

I feel very badly for ";" as it is a misunderstood and therefore, largely underrepresented form of punctuation. Sigh, I know how it feels. ;)

Would you seriously answer one of your daughter's questions in such a manner??? I hope to have an answer from you on this topic next week... or... perhaps I will just save up my daughter's most enlightening questions and pose them to you... so you can practice!

AndreAnna said...

Dagnabbit, I forgot to ask a question again. I am seriously a bad friend.

And the reason I chose that banner is because when I saw it, I thought of Michael. Its complete ridiculousness while in a "serious" setting, with a suit and tie, seemed all too appropriate. Very "The Office."

And totally something I could see him doing to make someone laugh.

"Hey guys, watch me put this trash basket on my head and see if BossMan notices!"

Patti said...

andreanna: I bet he has done that very thing. Or something eerily similar.

Beth said...

I haven't even gotten through the entire post and had to race to comment on your mortal enemy! Goofy! I mean Mike, I love ya even more! Down with Jeff Gordon! Het heem!!!!! hate him!

Erica AP said...

Funny funny, good stuff. I like, it's-a nice.

Heart Of Darkness said...

*hihi*

Lis said...

Damn! I'm too late. Never mind, there's always next week...

meleah rebeccah said...

I, love, my, commas, too. As for the semi-colon? "Why? It still trips me up a lot and tries to muscle in on the comma’s game!" Made my day! Thank you!

PS: You would KICK ass!! As a writer for SNL.

Jenny! said...

Have you seen the Mickey MOuse club...the most dreadful thing ever! I hate Mickey Mouse wiht a freaking passion!

I would vote for Nixon!

Tammie Jean said...

Once again, great answers! But... do you really want Mike Rowe's job? I mean, that's a really dirty job, because he does every dirty job! And did you see the episode where they were catching snakes, and one bit him for like 5 minutes? OMG it was so horrible I laughed!

Texaspeanut said...

If money was no object, what would be the one crazy, can't live without, off the wall item you had to buy?

a life uncommon said...

What color is your dream laptop? I'm really digging the Apple pink one but I might get sick of it so I think I'd pick the white one if I was going to buy an Apple.

Scottsdale Girl said...

HA! It was actually the one time I commented without some sort of sexual innuendo.

I need to work on that.

FRIGGA said...

Hmmm....

Michael C said...

Laughoristo: Thanks! I have no idea what that number would be, but thanks!

Patti: You can laugh. it is pretty funny!

Exception: I WILL answer that for you next week and yes, I DO need more practice ;-)

AA: it's ok!! You did a great job picking that photo. A real photo of me would not be have as realistic!!

Beth: You too are a Gordon hater?? Welcome to the family!!!!!

Erica AP: Thanks!!

Heart:
'K ;-)

Lis: Baring unforeseen hospital stays, yes, there is next week!!

Meleah: If I ever get to SNL, I'm creating 'Comma Man' just for us!! ;-)

Jenny!: Yes, Nixon had great joules. The greatest of any president!!!!! Plus his library is 15 minutes from me.

Tammie Jean: I do want his job, but I'll pass in the snake bites, than you very much ;-)

Texas: I promise I will answer this next week.

A Life Uncommon: good question. But now I've got all week to keep changing my mind about my answer ;-)

Scottsdale: Well, it did seem a little odd ;-)

Frigga: Hmmmmm indeed ;-)

AndreAnna said...

I think Comma Man would sound like William Shatner. There is, a ship, heading, this, way. We, must, raise, sheilds.

Now if you could get him to host, you'd be so set.

Michael C said...

AA: He would sound EXACTLY like the Shat. Brilliant!!!

Jenny! said...

I met Nixon at his library once! Great president!

kat said...

Damnit I missed question day. It's so ridiculous that I am looking forward to getting my schedule back on track so I can participate in question day. Until then, I elate in the questions posed by others. Bran definitely has some good ones.

And I love how you phrased the melted to burnt cheese reply. "Thread the needle..."

You're such a good writer! I lvoe it!