Saturday, April 07, 2007

Things I Learned This Week: 4/7/07

Because I want to spare you from experiencing some of the things I endured over the last few days, I post “Things I Learned This Week” each Saturday. It’s educational, sometimes insightful and for some reason it never makes me look good. I hope that knowing about at least one item on this list will make your upcoming week much easier. So here are the “Things I Learned This Week” for the week of 4/1/07-4/7/07.

! I learned that when I am at lunch with my coworkers and they are talking about their trips to Hawaii, I shouldn’t shout out “I watched a special on the Discovery Channel about Pearl Harbor last night’ just to fit in.

! I learned that when we are going to be staying in a nice hotel for a few nights I should not allow Lucy and Ethel to bring their musical instrument toys with them.

! I learned that when I notice that the new guy at work is shorter than I am (and believe me, that’s not saying much), I shouldn’t point it out to everyone.

! I learned that while calling all the females in the office by their last names may have seemed funny at first, I should have stopped doing it about a month ago.

! I learned that when I arrive late to work I should take the long way around the building to get to the coffee pot. Apparently, arriving late and then heading straight for the coffee before doing anything else doesn’t help my cause any.

! I learned that when my boss is trying to make a joke and he can’t remember the name of a certain medication, I shouldn’t be the first one to shout out “You mean Prozac?” Boy did I get some suspicious looks.

And lastly…

! I learned that when I get home from work and my wife says how tired she is because she’s been working around the house all day, I should not respond by saying, “Um, what did you do? Everything looks the same as it did this morning.”

16 comments:

CS said...

I read these out loud to my Mom, since I'm here visting. We agreed that the last one, especailly, probably is a good thing to learn.

St Jude said...

Oh dear sweetie, you do have a lot to learn... but then it is a sad day when 'we' don't learn something.

Dan said...

I learned that while calling all the females in the office by their last names may have seemed funny at first

I wish I would have thought of using their last names instead of the words I ended up using. Damn me to Hell!

Stacey said...

At least you didn't tell your wife, "I'm not tired and I spent all day at a REAL job."

You didn't, did you?

Josie said...

I never miss your "things I learned this week." It always gives me a chuckle.

Oh, and by the way, I now have "Yellow Submarine" going through my head.... and through my head.... and through my head....

Josie

mist1 said...

Not Prozac, Michael. You should have shouted out Valtrex. You know, the once a day herpes medication. You did know that didn't you? I'm not the only one here who knew what Valtrex was right?

I've seen the commercials, okay. Gawd.

Odat said...

yeah that coffe pot thing is surely a guilt trip...been there.

and tsk tsk on that last one.....
you better learn!!!!!'

Peace

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Thanks for going through the pains of learning these lessons and then sharing them with us so we don't have to experience the same pain. That last one sounded painful.

Patti said...

I liked the one about trying to fit in by sharing your "Discovery Channel" viewing habits.
Cute.

Sounds like my life - never stray too far from home. ;-)

R2K said...

: )

Michael C said...

cs: you are so right ;-)

st. jude: life is one big lesson they say. I usually fail that lesson.

Dan: very good point. last names it is.

stacey: let's just say I won't say that again ;-)

josie: sorry about that ;-)

mist1: valtrex? valtrex? what's valtrex? I've never heard of it ;-)

odat: one of these days...but then I'd lose a source for my material.

lone grey: I hope you have a better week than I did

Patti: I just felt I had to say something ;-)

R2K: Thanks for stopping by.

Abigail S said...

"Apparently, arriving late and then heading straight for the coffee before doing anything else doesn’t help my cause any."

Is it better or worse to be late because you went to Dunkin Donuts for coffee? That's why I'm always late :(

Violet said...

If I met someone who was shorter than me and not a child (or legless) I would have to point it out to everyone, because that person would have to be freakishly short.

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

sigh, i learn so much here...

smiles, bee

abbagirl74 said...

I have been called a lot worse.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I have also found it irresistible on occasion to point out that someone is shorter than I am. Gleefully. I am 5'1". When the even shorter person is male, double the penalties.