Saturday, February 17, 2007

Things I Learned This Week: 2/17/07

Because I want to spare you from experiencing some of the things I endured over the last few days, I post “Things I Learned This Week” each Saturday. It’s educational, sometimes insightful and for some reason, always makes me look pathetic. I hope that knowing about at least one item on this list will make your upcoming week much easier. So here are the “Things I Learned This Week” for the week of 2/11/07-2/17/07.

! I learned that when male coworker describes female coworker who smokes as ‘the big lady carrying the death stick,’ I’d better take the rest of the day off.

! I learned that the words all ‘you can eat buffet’ loosely translated means ‘five extra pounds.’

! I learned that when at a pro sports event and my friend and I are in line in the restroom and he has a large bag of merchandise that he just purchased, I shouldn’t ask him ‘you want a hand with that’ as he’s walking into a stall.

! I learned to make sure I have the house keys with me next time I leave home with Lucy and Ethel after it’s dark out and the weather is freezing cold. If not the keys, then at least a cell phone.

! I learned not to leave the litter box outside to dry for the entire day after cleaning it. Apparently, a cat can only hold it for so long.

! I learned not to drink 5-6 caffeine-loaded beverages prior to making the 3 ½ drive to Las Vegas.

And lastly,

! I learned to check my wife’s jewelry prior to shopping for her Valentine’s Day gift. When she opened the necklace I bought her, which was apparently identical to the one I bought her a few years ago, I’m not sure who was more embarrassed.

7 comments:

Odat said...

lol at the Valentine's Day gift...at least your taste is still the same!!! She could wear two at once now!
Peace...
(have a wonderful weekend!! Monday is Funday for me!!! Have off! )

Violet said...

That last one - it's not as embarrassing as watching your part-time workmate (whom you don't know well) open up the Secret Santa gift you bought her (some pretty junk jewellery), only to remember later that she's actually a jewellery artist.

Irene said...

Goodness! You really got your wife the same necklace twice? That's too funny!

At least she now has a spare in case she loses the first one. ;p

mist1 said...

I would have loved to seen the bathroom scene on camera.

captain corky said...

Great stuff Michael! I'm writing all of this down.

Josie said...

Michael, you always give me a chuckle. I can identify with at least some of the things on your list. I have a bad habit of "re-gifting" the secret Santa gifts, usually to the person who gave it to me last year.

I feel your pain.

Josie

CSL said...

Fun life lessons. And, you're a husband who remembers gifts on Valentines' Day - surely you get some credit for that.