Saturday, December 09, 2006

Things I Learned This Week: 12/9/06

Because I want to spare you from experiencing some of the things I endured over the last few days, I post “Things I Learned This Week” each Saturday. It’s educational, sometimes insightful and always pathetic. I hope that at least one item on this list will make your upcoming week much easier. So here are the “Things I Learned This Week” for the week of 12/3/06-12/9/06.

! I learned that just because another child sneezes while in the proximity of my child during a school Christmas recital that my child won’t become sick. I also learned that other parents don’t appreciate me pointing the sneezing child out to my wife while saying, “see, there’s another one, I told you Lucy and Ethel are gonna get sick!”

! I learned that my fellow coworkers don’t think I’m very smart just because I confused the measurements of feet and miles (momentarily, I might add) during a discussion about the altitude of our local mountains.

! I learned that just because my wife brings my daughters to work that it doesn’t give me the right to parade them into every office where I work to show them off…or the local restaurant I eat at for lunch every day.

! I learned that next time I volunteer to take 14 of my closest relatives to dinner that I need to choose someplace cheaper than an upscale Italian restaurant. The local burger dive would be just fine, and they probably have more seating and serve French fries!

! I learned that participating in all of the office Christmas parties and secret Santa gift exchanges might actually exceed what I make in any given pay period.

! I learned to never again buy a 32 ounce iced tea when I am conducting field visits for work and am 2 hours from home.

And lastly,

! I learned that the new wedding band my wife selected is 10 times more expensive than my new wedding band. I guess that’s what I get for buying new bands to celebrate our tenth anniversary…in May!


Le Nightowl said...

Let's hope the the band selected by your wife is tenfold better than yours, thus justifying the pricing discrepancy.
... French fries make a difference, don't they? :)

Odat said...

You're a good man for taking all those relatives
This was a funny list! Your wife has good taste, is all...accept it!

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

ten times more, yeah, what't the problem with that? seems about right to me. and i don't think there is anything wrong with parading ethel and lucy around at work either. seems like everyone would want to stop what they wanted to do to see what you wanted them to see. it's only fair i think. so don't worry about it, okay. bee

Irene said...

Are you sure about the sneezing thing? Because I sure am a paranoid mommy when it comes to that! ;p

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I see no earthly reason why everyone within a ten mile radius (not ten feet) wouldn't want to admire your family. It's their loss.

Everything costs more for women. It's the law.

Michael C said...

Le Nightowl: her band far exceeds mine and life tastes better w/French fries ;-)

Odat: Thanks!!

Empress Bee: I won't worry about it then. Have a great weekend!

Irene: You can't be more paranoid about it than me, trust me on that one ;-)

Heartsinsanfran: Thanks for that and as I have no problem with the women expense law ;-)

Violet said...

I'm similarly paranoid about my daughter being in the vicinity of sneezers and coughers. And yet I'm totally blase about her picking up stuff from the floor (any floor) and putting it into her mouth.

Skittles said...

Learning is a good thing :)