Thursday, December 21, 2006

Get Your Red Hot Reindeer Dogs!

I saw this little Associated Press story and couldn’t pass it up. Maybe it’s because I just spent three hours driving Lucy and Ethel around to look at Christmas lights. From Starbucks to Jack in the Box, food eateries try to add a little holiday spice to their menu this time of year. At one Chicago area hot dog stand, the holiday offering may be just a bit too much. The AP says that the stand is offering Reindeer Hot Dogs. They are produced in Alaska (you betcha)  and are supplemented by a little beef and pork because reindeer is apparently lean and dries out easily. That's what she said.  Ok, that one really didn't even make sense.  Sorry.  I'll be more judicious in my TWSS execution next time.

I know that deer meat is called venison, but I’m not sure what reindeer meat is called. I would suggest Prancer Pork, Donder Dogs or maybe even Blitzen Beef, but I’ll just play it safe and refer to them as Reindeer Dogs. The story didn’t mention how well the new item is selling, but my guess is not very well.

Mommy: Jimmy, would you like a hot dog or reindeer dog?
Jimmy: Wow, what’s a reindeer dog? Is it like a Happy Meal or something with a Christmas toy inside?
Mommy: Um, no sweetie. It’s ground up reindeer in a pink casing instead of beef or chicken.
Jimmy: You mean they took Rudolph and WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Obviously the new hot dog isn’t going to be big with the 8 and under crowd. No doubt that there will be plenty of curious folks who will want to try genuine reindeer meat. Once you add the mustard, relish and onions you probably can’t taste the difference anyway. Go ahead and say it, it tastes like chicken.  The downside to serving up a holiday icon in a bun is that it might not sell, though I really like the phrase 'holiday icon in a bun.'  And then there's 'holiday icon with a bun,' which would be Aunt Bee from The Andy Griffith Show, but now I've strayed way too far off topic. The upside of course is that this guy’s hot dog stand just got a ton of free publicity that will turn into increased sales. Reindeer with your meat so light, you’ll be on my bun tonight. Sorry, I couldn’t resist that.

I think the vendor has really tapped into a new line of holiday food items though. I can just see someone offering up a Frosty the Snow Man snow cone. The tagline: it contains a special blend of the essence of Frosty with just a dash of magic from his hat. Actually, as long as it isn't 'lemon' flavored, I just might try it. Now if I could only figure out what nog is.  Actually, don't tell me.  I don't want to know...

12 comments:

Lizza said...

Oh heavens. A reindeer hot dog just doesn't sound right. Will that guy be offering bunny hot dogs when Easter arrives?

Odat said...

I'm glad you're keeping Lucy and Ethel entertained...lol.

Rudolph the "Road Kill" Reindeer...oh my!

Peace

Natalie said...

I think it has been doing pretty well. Read an article in the local crap paper. I wouldn't know from experience though, that sounds disgusting. You're right, with all the mess Chicagoans put on their dogs you couldn't tell. Nice that you know they don't put ketchup on over here. I just found that out myself.

Shionge said...

Yo thanks for sharing this experience.

Taking this opportunity, Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year :P

Cece said...

That is wrong on so many different levels! LOL

Happy Holidays!

C said...

Nog? I am not sure what that is but apparently it is related in some way to the eggs.

thethinker said...

I'm actually really curious about what reindeer really tastes like... but not curious enough to actually taste it.

mist1 said...

I'll try any meat once.

mist1 said...

Yeah, I just wrote that. I had to come back and check.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

The possibilities are endless. And endlessly disgusting.

Violet said...

Well I wonder how many kids are going to take a pass on crispy bacon, after they've been to see Charlotte's Web.

Le Nightowl said...

You know what? I ate a reindeer sandwich a few years ago at Ikea, near the place where I was working at the time ... I know, probably a moment of distraction :)
I suggest "caribou hot dogs", for the sake of political correctness :)))
Marie