Monday, June 30, 2008

Top Ten Things Overheard On My Family Road Trip

When I fully recover, next summer, I shall post about the mileage odyssey that was my recent family vacation road trip. Did you know that with three stops (1 to eat, 2 to see the redwoods and a third for a catnap at one of our state’s lovely rest areas) that you can drive from northern Oregon to southern California in only one day? Literally one full day. As in leave Oregon at 9 in the morning and walk in your front door at 9 the next morning. I now have a whole new appreciation for truckers, several of whom I may have inadvertently cut off during those last few harrowing hours of my zombie driving. Having seen the sunrise and sunset and sunrise again, I can’t help but wonder if the feelings I experienced are the same feelings astronauts experience with every full orbit around the earth. I’m pretty sure I saw a cow tap dancing with a llama about an hour north of Magic Mountain on Interstate 5, but then I was pretty loopy at the time and had was listening to a Spanish speaking radio station because that’s all that would come in…

10. No that’s not me. It’s the cows we are driving by.

9. Quit calling me Mommy because Mommy is driving and I’m not. Seriously girls, that hurts.

8. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, the twins want to listen to High School Musical again!

7. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, the twins want to watch the High School Musical DVD again!

6. Oh the DVD player stopped working right in the middle of High School Musical. What a shame!

5. We’re going to a cheese factory. Why? What type of question is why? Because they make cheese there. You’ll like it. Ok, here’s the deal: if you go and pretend to enjoy it, I’ll buy you an ice cream cone.

4. You know, you just don’t get to pull over on the side of the road and watch a cow give birth in Southern California. Of course if you did pull over, it would cause a Sig Alert.

3. No Ethel, that deer is just sleeping in the middle of the highway. I’m pretty sure they all do it.

2. Now that everything is all cleaned up and we’re back on the road again, I would like to state that for the record, Ethel’s elapsed time between saying she needed to hurl and the actual commencement of hurlfication was less than 2 minutes. We can now plan accordingly next time.

1. Ok, in my defense, I thought driving 18 straight hours would have more of a Smokey and the Bandit feel to it.

18 comments:

cmk said...

Family road trips! Can there be anything better--for blog fodder, that is! :D Glad you survived.

AndreAnna said...

I can't wait for those road trips.

Doesn't your car have the wireless headphones for the DVD player so they can listen to the movie while you guys can listen to the radio? Those are my favorite invention!

Alison said...

OK, you probably don't want to know what I think about in-car DVD players (*old fart alert*), but I will say that you actually made me want to watch a Burt Reynolds movie. Bravo.

Sizzle said...

You did 18 hours in one run!? You are certifiable.

This one was my favorite: 5. We’re going to a cheese factory. Why? What type of question is why? Because they make cheese there. You’ll like it. Ok, here’s the deal: if you go and pretend to enjoy it, I’ll buy you an ice cream cone.

Because EVERYONE WINS!

Ralph said...

All I remember from myriad long trips, as one of seven kids, is that we seemed to need to use a bathroom as often as possible...nothing like a toilet review of every gas station and truck stop.

When we were little on trips, all we had was AM. No DVD's, MP3's, etc. and my father preferred to listen to all-news stations. Travel entertainment was a non-starter in 60s road trips.

sari said...

We took our sons to see the play of HSM the other night. It was ok but I can't get "We're All In This Together" out of my head and it was last Thursday, for the love of Pete.

And in all actuality, I prefer HSM II, myself.

Amy said...

Getting back from Oregon today and we saw a big black bear that had just been hit by a trucker. It was the first time I had seen a bear on the side of the road.

I hope you had fun...

We've done that same trip 4 times! We did the Southern California trip to Bend, OR once when our daughter was 3 months old...they closed the grapevine and we had a detour though Bakersfield...It was the longest 4 hour detour ever!! That huge hill heading up to Magic Mountain...I'll never forget that site...so cool!

Did you stop at the Olive Pit?

Hope you enjoyed our heat!

Odat said...

What happened to looking out the window and counting the different color license plates? Which my hub and I did on our trip cross country...hahahaha.

I can't believe you drove 18 hours straight..you're crazy!!! (but, then, we all knew that)


Peace

Odat said...

What happened to looking out the window and counting the different color license plates? Which my hub and I did on our trip cross country...hahahaha.

I can't believe you drove 18 hours straight..you're crazy!!! (but, then, we all knew that)


Peace

Terri said...

oh about #1......NEVER, not with kids. :o)

chefmom said...

WOW!! What a trip! Who would question going to a cheese factory??? The Deer sleep in the middle of the highway here also, incase Ethel wanted to know.

magickat said...

Holy moo-ly (sorry - had to!) that is a LOT of driving. I don't know if I could handle it. Especially while listening to High School Musical.

Selma said...

High School Musical on a loop and 18 hours straight - you are a legend!

Natalie said...

The fam used to do very similar trips from MN to NY to visit family out there and i must say our soundtrack was a little better, but then again the kids were more like 6 and 9 than 2 5yr olds. Young MC, Talking Heads, Paula Abdul, Bobby Brown, Milli Vanilli (don't knock it those are THE JAMS), DJ Jazzy Jeff & Fresh Prince, Motown, Stevie Wonder, and the Eurythmics were the ones on repeat.

Mel Heth said...

What road trip would be complete without some hurlage, right? I just hope it wasn't right after you visited the cheese factory.

Employee No. 3699 said...

Wow, 18 hours! I thought 10 hours was alot with young kids.

"...the deer is just sleeping in the middle of the road..." Loved that!

Toodles~

P.S. Are you now singing songs from High School Musical around the copy machine?

Eva said...

Welcome back! It's crazy that you drove 18 hours straight! And totally something I would do too, because that gives you more time at your destination and requires less time on the road, sort of! Also: Now I have Smokey & The Bandit quotes floating around my head. "That guy is taking a 10-100!" LM!

meleah rebeccah said...

I would have veered off into oncoming traffic if I had to listen to anything "High School Musical"

Yikes!!!!