It’s Pulled Pork Time In Georgia!

A Georgia resident recently shot an 1100-pound wild hog says the Associated Press. The man shot the animal when he spotted it in a neighbor’s yard, which makes you wonder how many dogs his neighbor has lost, if you catch my drift, which you probably didn't. However, jokes are never funny if you have to explain them, so we'll just move right along...

After shooting the hog, he took it to a weigh station to see just how big it was. This guy is just like me. Whenever I kill something, my first reaction is to drag it to the closest scale. Unfortunately, flies, mosquitoes and moths don’t weigh that much so the thrill is kind of lacking. Although it’s still not determined whether this hog is the biggest ever found in Georgia, it does weigh a few hundred pounds more than the famous ‘Hogzilla’ that was killed a few years ago. I guess that makes this pig Mothra-hog? Now if you are not familiar with the Godzilla Trilogy, that made no sense. Let's try it this way: if the previously known biggest pig was that one guy on 'The Odd Couple,' the new bigger pig is that other guy that the one guy lived with on 'The Odd Couple.' Kind of. Again, perhaps we should just move on...

The pig is now hanging from a tree in the man’s front yard, which is a good thing since houses always seem to look so bare after all the Christmas lights and decorations are taken down. The fact that it’s a dead obese animal and will probably start to have a horrible stench within the next few days is completely irrelevant of course. I can’t think of a better way to keep those pesky neighborhood kids off the lawn than a dead feral pig swaying from a tree.