Q & A Monday – Installment 3

Things will be pretty brief this week. Two people submitted questions. While this would normally make someone question the need for a Q & A Day, it just makes me grateful. Grateful that ANYONE asked questions, which brings me to the part where I need to apologize to not getting around to all of your blogs as often as I should be lately. I really only have two excuses: 1) That whole pesky ‘don’t blog again at work or you’ll be in trouble’ thing and 2) The steroidal kiddy pool currently housed in my backyard. Believe me, the combination is an online time killer! For that, I do apologize but am oh so grateful to still have people that want to visit here.

Ok, before I question the answers, or something like that, let’s review the rules. First and perhaps most importantly, do not repeat these answers in a public forum as your sanity and credibility may will be questioned. Second, I do not research my answers so they very well may not be true, I believe this is mainly because it’s often easier to make things up than it is to study or verify them. Lastly, I usually ACCIDENTALLY forget at least one submitted question every week, though I really have no excuse for doing so this time around…

First off this week, and I’m going to warn you that once you have read the answer to this question, we will be half way done, is Eva. She asks: ‘Have you dropped your quest to have "Now if you'll excuse me I have to go x-ray my chicken" become a part of society's vernacular?
No I have not. I may have gotten away from using it for a while, but that was because I overused it at work and was accused by our HR department of using the word ‘chicken’ as a substitute or ‘slang alternative’ for a sinister, possibly even adult meaning. Obviously, this was untrue as the phrase really did come about from a dinner discussion I had with friends who had a sick chicken. Really. We were eating at an Italian restaurant at the time, if you need further proof. Oh, and I made that HR part up, in case they are reading this.

Last up this week, we have a fellow cubicle dweller, Employee No. 3699, who asked: ‘What is your favorite letter of the alphabet and why? Who is your favorite cartoon character? Butter or margarine?’
Well, my instinct is to go with the letter ‘A’ because it’s the first one and I get it over with quicker. However, ‘x’ is pretty cool. It’s very versatile, especially for people who prefer what rude people like to call a ‘lazy’ lifestyle, although I prefer to call it a ‘lifestyle of activity efficiency.’ ‘X’ can be used as a substitute for larger words like x-ray, Christmas, and most likely another handful that I can’t recall without looking them up. So, I’ll go with ‘h.’ My favorite cartoon character is Paris Hilton. What will she do next? Ok, seriously it’s a tie between Homer Simpson and Johnny Bravo. As far as butter and margarine go, I can’t recall ever having margarine. I normally have stuff like ‘I can’t believe it didn’t congeal like butter’ or ‘What a crock of country,’ but whenever I get the real deal butter, it’s a very special day indeed.

Ok, that’s all I’ve got for this week. Feel free to send me your questions for next Monday, but I feel I should warn you: question slots are going fast. Yep, about as fast as a raised 4-door two-ton pickup off a used car lot in Los Angeles. That’s a gas joke. Well, a petroleum based joke, not the pull my finger kind.