Lunch – The Breeding Ground For Great Ideas?? Also Known As What My Problem Really Is

At last I figured out why I have so much trouble at work. It’s not attitude, it’s not discipline, it’s not intelligence, it’s all about area of expertise, passion for what I do and comfort…ok, and a little bit of attention deficit disorder. But in my defense, when you have to stare at the same walls all day long, who can blame me?

I finally figured this out at lunch today. There we were talking about work and making work plans and being proactive when female coworker mentioned wanting to tan on her day off so she could wouldn’t have to wear nylons in Arizona for a wedding in September. Partner In Crime (formerly In The Office Two Days A Week Guy), mentioned that Nylons in Arizona sounds like the name of a bad musical. At that point, my true work talents took over and the rest of the ‘business’ lunch was lost. Partner in Crime and I spent the remainder of our lunch working on lyrics for this new musical, much, much, much to Female Coworker’s chagrin.

I started with the opening number: ‘It’s Hot’. It went something like:
It’s Hot, It’s Hot
Oh my my, it’s Hot
It’s a dry heat, not good on the thigh heat
I regret, that there’s sweat
It’s hot, It’s hot

Yeah, that’s really as far as we got, but we had the whole ‘jazz hands’ thing working and everything for the choreography. Next came ‘Tour of Arizona.’

Scottsdale, Phoenix
Marana, Casa Grande
Tuscson, Flagstaff
Time for a good laugh
Let’s tour Arizona…in Nylons

Then came the problem. What in the heck do we rhyme with ‘Nylons?’ Pylons? Crylon? Cylons? Yes, if you’re one of the 27 people still alive who is willing to admit that you watched ‘Battlestar Gallactica’ growing up, Cylons would mean something. Otherwise it’s a pretty obscure and useless reference. Do we use the term ‘hose’ instead of nylons? Hose, pose, crows, foes, rows…it really didn’t present any better opportunities.

As with any great creative team, disagreements are bound to arise. Case in point: since the only purpose of this song was to name cities in Arizona, I desperately wanted to work in the line ‘standing on a corner in Winslow, Arizona’ as a tribute to the Eagles. Partner in Crime suggested there were copyright issues in doing this and unbelievably, Female Coworker did not seem to get the reference. I volunteered to change it up a little to something like ‘waiting on a curb in Winslow, Arizona’ or ‘standing by the side of the street NEAR Winslow, Arizona,’ but eventually abandoned the idea.

As lunch drew to a close, we were busy working on the big finale. I imagined it would involve lots of ladies dressed in nylons that would rip off with one tug right before the curtain falls. The song would be all about overcoming the discomfort of wearing nylons…obviously something Partner in Crime and I know a lot about, just as we know what it feels like to give birth!

Nylons are tight
They never fit just right
They run, but that’s not fun
They snag
Oh what a drag!
I hate wearing Nylons in Arizona
Maybe in Tacoma, perhaps in Sonoma
But never, ever Arizona……(cue the big finish)

And that folks is my problem. I spent the entire remainder of the day and night focused mentally on this new Musical ‘Nylons in Arizona.’ I should also mention here that I don’t think I have ever attended a musical. Regardless, while everyone else was able to get back into the office and concentrate on the many tasks at hand, I kept finding my mind drifting off to scene sets, choreography, lyrics, casting, publicity and wardrobe…and of course, what else to rhyme with nylons. Now that I know what my illness is, I can be more aware of it in the hopes of making myself a better employee. Now, how do I convince NBC that a sit-com about wearing nylons in the desert is a funny idea?????


****I wanted to thank everyone that voted for my blog as one of the ‘Bestest Blogs of the Year’ over at Bobby’s Blog. Somehow, my blog finished the voting in 5th place. I was literally shocked when I found out! Yes, I even threw up a little bit in my mouth. It is so cool that other people enjoy reading what I have to make up say. It really is touching…thanks so much. Seriously, thanks! I didn’t even vote for myself…******


Also, here’s a reminder to get your questions in for next Tuesday’s Q & A Tuesday since this will probably be my last post until next Tuesday (you can read below to see why). Did I really need to say Tuesday three times in this reminder???